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Three Ways to Find Fulfillment Outside of Sex & Intimacy


Fulfillment is defined as “the achievement of something desired, promised, or predicted.” It is natural for us to desire intimacy with people we are attracted to. And often, that intimacy comes in the form of sex.

Sex and intimacy can be fulfilled in relationships, but as we work on ourselves, we often realize the bigger challenge is what does fulfillment look like outside of sex and intimacy? It’s a question that I’ve personally challenged myself to answer, as I find myself spending more time alone and desiring genuine connections and interactions with people.

To be clear, I’m not throwing out the idea of celibacy. While I respect people who take the celibate journey, I’m not placing that pressure on myself or others. I think the spiritual journey is something separate; yet, related to finding fulfillment outside of sex.

So, what does that look like?

Here are three ways to explore finding fulfillment outside of sex and intimacy.

1.     Spending more time with people

In general. Whether attracted to someone or not, Taking more time to go on lunch dates, and have in-depth conversations with people is a great way to build meaningful connections. It’s easy to focus solely on “networking,” and “dating,” but taking the extra time to spend with people, with no intentions can be a great way to learn more about yourself and what fuels you.

2.     Physical Activity

Not that type of physical activity! Sexual energy can be channeled elsewhere, and self-pleasure isn’t always satisfying. Taking the time to channel those natural urges felt toward something more productive or challenging, can actually be really useful. Taking a kickboxing class, doing yoga or even just weight-lifting is a great way to transform sexual energy.

3.     Meditation & Journaling

People often recommend meditation to completely clear your head, but sometimes meditation is great to process your thoughts. How do you truly feel about someone? What is the energy you’re sensing? How are you taking care of yourself mentally, physically, spiritually – and how is someone contributing to a healthy relationship with self? These are all questions that can be put into the universe and answered through meditation.

Journaling can also be helpful in holding back emotions. Every emotion that we feel does not need to be shared with the person we feel them toward. Especially, because once you’ve shared those feelings, you are in “reactive mode,” and you’re not necessarily processing or dealing with your emotions. Sometimes, instead of communicating them directly to someone, we can share that expression through the form of writing.

Cheers to self-discovery and fulfillment! Have any tips on finding fulfillment outside of physical touch? Share them below in a comment.

Photo Credit: @yogi_goddess

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